At it again

Hey Hey!!! We are baaaaccckkkk! {or at least I’m back on behalf of this family of mine}. Wow, it’s been a long time since I spent quality time in this space. In fact, I’ve only written here twice since Esme's birth in December of 2014. Where has the time gone?

Well, I can tell you. It’s gone to changing diapers, making bottles, reading books, doing hair, homeschooling, calming tantrums, soothing fears, healing booboos, mediating arguments, picking up toys, picking up more toys, doing laundry {allllll the time}, giving baths, washing dishes, playing outside, teaching skills, traveling, cooking, dancing, Netflix-ing {Is that a word? It is now.}, sleeping {less than we would like to}, singing, laughing, and so much more. In short, we have been living.

There have been a lot of hard days but even more good days. We have grown and learned so much. We have simplified. We have attempted to find some form of balance. We have rested. We have healed. We have enjoyed just being.

So much has changed in the nearly 2.5 years since Esme was born, but much remains the same as well. Life is still chaos. We expect it to remain this way possibly forever. I still have not framed or hung 75% of the art I bought to put up in our house {I blame it on the previous statement}. I’m still obsessed with my Honda Pilot. We are still living in Southern California. Travis still works full time and I stay home with the kids full time. I still have not learned to sew and therefore rely on my mother-in-law to bring to life my many kid's fashion designs. We are still happy. ;) Those are the big things.

But life has brought us a sweet season of moving forward in many areas of our lives as well. Since Esme was born, we joined a new church plant, Collective Church, on the the Westside of Los Angeles. We cut off Kingston’s lovely long locks {still grieving that decision}. We moved into a house {less than a mile from our apartment} with an amazing backyard. We started hosting a bi weekly neighborhood dinner. I finally got a Kitchenaid mixer {I mean talk about moving on up in the mom world}. Travis started a new job at a company he loves called Trello, and now works full time {for better or for worse} from home. I started homeschooling Kingston. We lost two of our beloved grandparents and gained five new family members. And we both turned 30! God has sustained us and blessed us greatly. We are so thankful.

And now, as you may have expected from the relaunch of this blog, our lives are about to change a bit more because… WE ARE GETTING A DOG!!! Kidding. Lord willing, that’ll never happen. ;) But really, change IS coming for our family because we are adopting again!

That’s right. We are throwing our hat in the ring, we are diving in head first, we are… ok I’m out of analogies, but you get the picture.

The Lord has called. We are answering. We are nervous, excited, scared, peaceful, and joyful. We are so thankful that the Lord has asked us to grow our family again, and we can’t wait to see who the sixth Fischer will be.

As mentioned previously, I recently turned 30 {and yes, I’m still flirty and thriving}. During my birthday celebrations, a friend asked me what single thing stuck out the most about the year I spent being 29. As I stopped to think about that question, I realized there was really nothing that stuck out about that year of my life. You may be thinking, “well that’s sad.” but I am so grateful for that!

I told her that this last year for me and for our family has really just been a year of rest, settlement, and contentment. It’s been a year of discovery, of just being together, growing together, and learning more about who we each are. We have established a routine. We have gotten into a rhythm. We have caught our breath.

Fun{?} fact about me: I start to get baby fever whenever my youngest turns one. If I would’ve had it my way, we would’ve started this adoption process a year ago after Esme’s first birthday. But, thankfully, my sweet husband shut me down because he knew we needed more time. And looking back on it now, I could not be an ounce more grateful for this past year of stability and refreshment we have had.

SO much happened in our 20s. We got engaged, married, graduated college, moved 2000 miles away, gave birth to two kids, adopted one kid, changed jobs 5 times, moved to a new house, joined a new church, and those are just the major things. There hasn’t been a year that we haven’t experienced at least one huge and monumental event until the year I spent being 29. All of those things that were happening were good. They were blessings and stepping stones and have created a beautiful life for us.

But it was a lot. And a lot of years in a row filled with so many things will drain you physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. It wasn’t until I turned 30 that I really looked back over the last decade of my life, and realized the impact operating at such an intense pace had on our lives. And now I know that we NEEDED my year of 29. We needed that year to heal and recharge and refocus.

I could not be more thankful for that opportunity now that we are entering the adoption process again. Adoption is not something you want to begin when you are at the end of your rope. It is not something you want to do when you are just getting by. It is not something you can commit to half-heartedly. It requires alllllll of your energy, emotions and strength. I feel so thankful to be starting this journey in a good and healthy place.

There’s soooo much more I could write about this, and I’m sure I will. But for now here are some fast facts for curious minds:

1. We are currently updating our home study. There is a lot we have to redo since we have moved since completing our last one. We plan to have our home study done mid-May.

2. We plan to pursue another domestic adoption, but will not know which state the child will be from until we are matched with a birth mom.

3. We plan to go active and begin presenting our family profile book in mid-June after spending some quality time with our families.

4. Much of our hearts in this process remain the same as when we were in the process of adopting Esme, but, naturally, we have grown and changed in the last three years. I have done my best to update our Why adoption, Why now, and Why domestic pages of the website to include some feelings we have and things we have processed this time around while also leaving what was originally written before we adopted Esme. I have labeled our current process as “Adoption #2” and left the original posts from three years ago labeled as “Esme’s adoption”. I hope this is not confusing for anyone, but I did not want to erase what we wrote from our hearts during our first adoption process.

I will be writing again soon with more updates, but this post is already obnoxiously long. If you made it all the way to this paragraph, you are a trooper and real friend ;) Thank you for caring.

Please feel free to leave comments or message me with questions you may have. You can also find me on social media where I’m sure I will be sharing more tidbits. Until then, feel free to hop around this site. I did my best to give it a little update of pictures and info, so it wasn't completely outdated. I hope to update it more in the coming weeks.

We are excited to share this process with you all once again.